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Marriage – First Few Thoughts

December 9, 2013
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I got married on 18 November 2013.

Ever since, people have been asking me, “How does it feel to be married?”

And I answer different things to different people at different times! They range from “It feels great” to “It doesn’t feel anything special”, depending on my mood and the person asking ;)

In fact, I really do not know the answer. On the day of my marriage, I did not realise at what precise point of time, I became married – whether it was during exchange of garlands or putting of vermillion on my forehead or walking the seven rounds or signing on the marriage registration form!

Earlier, everybody told me that a wedding was like a fairy tale. Friends prodded me to enroll myself in bridal beauty treatment packages and enlightened me about chocolate waxing, gold facial and pearl dental treatments! I was advised to get blouses stitched by designers, buy saris from boutiques and invest in diamond jewellery (apart from the traditional gold)! I was told to get 8 hours of sleep and drink 8 glasses of water every day! I was also informed about special diets which would help me lose weight but not my natural glow! I was even gifted eye gels 6 months prior to my wedding to cure my dark circles.

A variety of people deluged me with questions like – “Who is doing the catering?” “Will you have fish and chicken or prawn and mutton in the menu?” “Where will you go for your honeymoon?” “Will artificial or real flowers be used for decorating the venue?” “Are you arranging for transportation for the close relatives?” “Are you quitting your job since you are now based in Calcutta and your husband is based in NCR?” “Who else have you invited from our group (so that I can co-ordinate with them for a joint gift)?”

At the end, all it took was me, my husband, the pandit and the marriage registrar to finish it off and our parents and elders to bless us!

After it was all over, I wondered whether it was necessary to spend lakhs and lakhs of rupees, endure sleepless nights, worry about every minor details of organisation, listen to advice from different people and then endure their displeasure, for something which could have been completed so simply and easily?

Or was it so nerve-wracking for me because I almost single-handedly organised and planned my own wedding? From deciding the photographer, make-up artist, traipsing all over Calcutta for buying not only my trousseau but stuff for everybody else, arranging transportation, planning timelines, deciding the venue, its decoration, the caterer and the menus, checking whether everything was in place every five minutes to ensuring that my parents do not collapse from exhaustion – I did it all.

Now, I am back in the blogosphere, with a new location, new office, new house, new family and a new marital status. ;P

I am still in the process of settling down in my new life. I will soon come back with my views/notes/opinion/advice on the process, planning and execution and the feelings associated with the most important event of one’s life – marriage.

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3 Comments leave one →
  1. psb permalink
    December 9, 2013 4:15 pm

    I believe its not new ‘marital’ status but new ‘relationship’ status…or am I missing something here? ;P

    • debosmita permalink*
      December 9, 2013 4:18 pm

      I believe it can be both ;P

  2. December 9, 2013 5:02 pm

    I was more keen on posting something hi funda gibberish here…but after seeing the above comment…all I have to say is- “dampotyo jibon bhaloi cholche bojha jache” ;) just pulling your leg…but I agree about that extra inquisitiveness part…have to handle it every now and then….be prepared, it will just grow manifold from here. I have a bunch of relatives who now keep on asking me “what gift did Biswa buy you for pujo/anniversary” and likewise….but those ones will always be there. Apart from that marriage is pretty much a wonderful and a very private affair. And I know that you will make your fairy tale a beautiful one :) you are one of those few girls I know who pack a perfect blend of the old and the new. Looking forward to read and hear more stories :)

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